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Vision Board

What do you want? A simple question, perhaps… but not one that may be all that easy to answer. Do you know what you want? I am not asking if you know how to go about getting what you want; but rather if you know what it is your heart desires? It is very easy for me to have a fleeting idea of what I may want and then quickly depart to “but we don’t have the time for that now” or “but that is far too expensive” or “we have small kids so that’s just not a possibility for us” or “with work and family commitments that isn’t doable” or hundreds of other logical reasons as to why my desire cannot be fulfilled.  And that is where I used to stop. Allowing my desires to be limited by the bounds of my own imagination. Quenching those desires before they had a chance to see the light of day. There was also a deeply ingrained perception I seemed to have that it was selfish to have desires. It took a lot of practice to get in touch with what I truly want. Honestly, it still takes effort. Even w...
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Resentment is a Signpost

Do you get angry or resentful if you see your husband relaxing on the couch when there’s so much to do? Do you begrudge him having time outside the home, away from the kids? Do you sometimes feel like he has it so much easier than you do? Four years ago I found myself seething while vacuuming under my husband’s feet. It was 8.45pm and I was seven months pregnant with our third child.  There he was, the man I fell head-over-heels in love with seven years before, resting on the couch…and I was still going. Still working. Still trying to get everything done.  ‘ How could he rest?! Doesn’t he see me? ’ I thought. ‘ How can he think that it is okay to just sit there when he knows I find walking painful at this stage of pregnancy, never-mind vacuuming? Clearly he doesn’t love me or care about me ’, I confirmed.  I dreamed of my husband saying ‘ let me do that…sit down, love. You deserve to rest…you’ve done enough ’. But the permission to rest never came. USING RESENTMENT AS A S...
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Remember ‘FUN’?

I had always imagined being a fun-loving and happy mother.  Being a mum was what I had always wanted. However, there came a point in my life, a few years ago, where I allowed myself to take a look around and be honest with myself about what I saw. There was no playfulness, very little laughter and a distinct absence of fun in my life. I had become serious and pretty sombre almost all of the time. How did I get here? Was it my too-high expectations leading to continuous disappointment? Was it my perfectionist attitude being disappointed with anything less than the unattainable perfection from myself and others around me? Regardless of what the cause or causes may have been, I made the conscious decision to re-introduce fun and laughter into my life. Regularly. Have you forgotten fun lately? Think back to who you were before you were married. Before you had the responsibilities you have now.  What were five things you would do for fun? It doesn’t take me long to remem...
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