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Vision Board

What do you want? A simple question, perhaps… but not one that may be all that easy to answer. Do you know what you want? I am not asking if you know how to go about getting what you want; but rather if you know what it is your heart desires? It is very easy for me to have a fleeting idea of what I may want and then quickly depart to “but we don’t have the time for that now” or “but that is far too expensive” or “we have small kids so that’s just not a possibility for us” or “with work and family commitments that isn’t doable” or hundreds of other logical reasons as to why my desire cannot be fulfilled.  And that is where I used to stop. Allowing my desires to be limited by the bounds of my own imagination. Quenching those desires before they had a chance to see the light of day. There was also a deeply ingrained perception I seemed to have that it was selfish to have desires. It took a lot of practice to get in touch with what I truly want. Honestly, it still takes effort. Even when
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Resentment is a Signpost

Do you get angry or resentful if you see your husband relaxing on the couch when there’s so much to do? Do you begrudge him having time outside the home, away from the kids? Do you sometimes feel like he has it so much easier than you do? Four years ago I found myself seething while vacuuming under my husband’s feet. It was 8.45pm and I was seven months pregnant with our third child.  There he was, the man I fell head-over-heels in love with seven years before, resting on the couch…and I was still going. Still working. Still trying to get everything done.  ‘ How could he rest?! Doesn’t he see me? ’ I thought. ‘ How can he think that it is okay to just sit there when he knows I find walking painful at this stage of pregnancy, never-mind vacuuming? Clearly he doesn’t love me or care about me ’, I confirmed.  I dreamed of my husband saying ‘ let me do that…sit down, love. You deserve to rest…you’ve done enough ’. But the permission to rest never came. USING RESENTMENT AS A SIGNPOST It was
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What We Focus On Increases

What is good and right in your life?  When we are feeling overwhelmed, overburdened and that life is hard, it can feel too much to even try to find things to be grateful for. It can feel like yet another thing we’re failing at. We  know  we have much to be grateful for and feeling low, depressed, overwhelmed or not able to cope when we, logically speaking, have so much to be grateful for can add to the guilt we already feel. Particularly as perfectionists, it can be easy to focus on the 2% we have not achieved. On the flaws. On the problems. On what is not working, not done, not good. On the issues we are facing with our spouse. On the worries we have for our children. On the frustrations we have with others in our lives.  When our focus is on these things, it can become all we see.  Think just for a moment about when you learn you are pregnant, or when desiring to have a baby. Suddenly you begin to see pregnant women and babies everywhere! It is because your mind is focused there. Wha
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